Scrambled Eggs

I'd never put American cheese in my scrambled eggs before... not sure why - I'd made omelets with cheese but never scrambled eggs and then someone told me about cooking them that way. One week night evening after dance I was cooking eggs for daughter for dinner and I put American cheese in them and she loved it... and now, whenever we have scrambled eggs, she always makes sure to ask if I am putting the cheese in them... it's her favorite way to eat eggs. Each time, as I tear the cheese in pieces to add to the cooking eggs, I think of that person - the one who gave me the tip.

It's funny how people come and go from our lives... how they linger for a while and leave their mark, forever changing us for better or for worse. It is rare, if ever, that we have the foresight to know which it will be in the end. We make connections, teach lessons, share thoughts and pain and joy... and then it slips away... lost, leaving a hole - an empty space, a sadness.

It hurts to lose someone... it's hard to let go. How do you cope with that? Because it's impossible to know before hand any outcome... because there is no guarantee what do you do? I guess there are only two choices really - you either close yourself off, refusing to be vulnerable or you open yourself up, exposing yourself to the possibility of the hurt. Or is there a way to strike a balance? A way to appreciate the beauty and take all the good yet leave the hurt and disappointment behind? I wish I knew...

Somehow something keeps me open... I guess I am innocent and naive... not the hard ass I like to believe I can be... but I think I'm realistic at the same time... aware and cognizant of the possibility... the possibility of joy and the possibility of pain. Life is much too short to miss out on any one thing that might lead to wonderful....

So I add cheese to my eggs... and I smile at the memory - at all the memories...